From April 30 - May 4, 2007, Conan O'Brien once again hit the road for May sweeps, this time for a week of shows from the Orpheum Theater in San Francisco, California. With guests like Robin Williams, George Lucas and Snoop Dogg booked for the Bay Area, San Fran seemed like it would break the eerily similar vibe Conan's last trip outside 30 Rock, to Chicago, had in relation to Conan's Toronto visit in 2004. However, being the sad viewer I am, San Fran, like Chicago, still had many Toronto-esque features evident, begging the question of whether all of Conan's travels are now simply trying to replicate his ideal Toronto trip, as his visit highlighted Conan at his wildest, wackiest, and funniest while on the road, unmatched so far. Here's the proof: While not making an immediate impression as in Chicago, the Bear made his triumphant entrance to SF on May 3, showing up at San Francisco's official "Conan O'Brien Day" to accept a key to the city on behalf of mayor Gavin Newsom. While his appearance was brief, simply accepting Newsom's declaration before...well, pleasuring himself...he still had an impact in San Fran, not to mention in front of a large live crowd, and the mayor's representatives. While he was not banned (as in Chicago), this appearance marks the second consecutive Bear spotting while Conan has been on tour, since the Bear's appearance atop Toronto's financial district back in February 2004.   While only appearing in the opening San Fran show on April 30, Conan and bandleader Max Weinberg again engaged in a local "Small Talk Moment" to appeal to local viewers, debating on the recent collapse of a highway connecting to the Bay Bridge and overall failures of the Bay Area transport system. While Conan's nearly incoherent rambling about virtually every California interstate made for great television, it alluded not only back to Chicago in 2006, but right back to Toronto, where the "Canadian Small Talk Moment" was featured as the first ever Small Talk Moment on Late Night, a later staple feature of the show.   Well, Conan did it again. With the exception of a number of unnamed members of The Glide Ensemble choir, not a single female guest appeared on Late Night, making Conan 3-for-3 in lack of local ladies since his Toronto visit. The Bay area offers many famed and loved celebrities, including Teri Hatcher, Kate Walsh, Aisha Tyler, as well as musicians like Keyshia Cole (and even if Conan got desperate, the Bay area is home to the notorious Monica Lewinsky and Courtney Love!). The trend is becoming rather frightful, and hopefully Conan's sexuality (or lack thereof, evidently) will be answered on his next trip from NYC!   Okay, so I may be taking this a little too literally, but since Eric McCormack's visit in Toronto, Conan just cannot seem to get enough of the many stars of the former NBC sitcom Will & Grace. In Chicago, he welcomed star and hometown hero Sean Hayes to promote the show's final week, and on May 1, Conan welcomed television and film star (not to mention Canadian!) Will Arnett. Now, although not truly a star, Arnett did guest star in the season 7 W&G episode "Back Up, Dancer" as Artemis Johnson. While not officially a leading castmember of the show, this still counts as following yet another Late Night trend that started that majestic week at the Elgin Theatre...   Unlike Toronto and Chicago, Conan was guilty twice this week of promoting out-of-town guests on a week full of Bay Area celebs. Firstly, as they were starting a U.S. tour in SF the next night, Conan featured Arctic Monkeys, of Sheffield, England, as the musical guests on April 30. And secondly, Conan featured not only an out-of-towner, but a native Torontonian, Will Arnett, on the show on May 1! Arnett proudly proclaimed his nationhood when describing his skating abilities in his latest film, Blades Of Glory, reversing the "fish out of water" trend first started by New England native Adam Sandler in Toronto, who proclaimed his Canadianness by announcing he was from "Fat Alberta."   Seemingly short a musical guest for the week, Late Night turned to the local Glide Ensemble, the choir of the Glide Memorial United Methodist Church on Ellis Street, a San Fran staple for over forty years. However, while the performance was certainly lively and rousing, and the group is a constant in Bay Area community activities, The Glide Ensemble is largely unknown beyond the Bay Area, much like Conan's previous attempts to bring in unique local celebrities to give his shows a local flavour. He did it with Vlasta the Polka Queen in Chicago, and first did it with champion moose caller Ken Capling in Toronto, seeking a local touch as he did three years prior.   Unlike before, Conan's week in San Fran not only featured three musical performances, but even a medley of Bay Area-inspired songs. Conan air-bongoed to Carlos Santana with Will Arnett, harmonized to Journey's "Lights" with Randy Jackson, and concluded his interview with Dana Carvey by serenading the Orpheum Theater with a hometown medley of "Lights," Starship's "We Built This City," and "San Francisco" by Scott McKenzie. Conan took the songs to new heights (and vocal pitches), even going as far as wearing a flower in his hair for McKenzie's tune. The enthusiasm and crowd involvement echoed Jim Carrey's performance of "A Place To Stand" back in 2004, although it is certainly hard to top Carrey's rendition with his notorious "joking face."   Sure, this may be stretching it, but hey, it's my site, I do what I please. Conan did not in fact visit any gay bars, which are quite commonplace in the Bay Area, on his tour of the city, and in fact the only reference at all was from Robin Williams on May 1, recommending Conan visit Moby Dick in the Castro District on 18th Street. However, San Fran's LGBT and queer culture was certainly not ignored, capped off with the introduction of Conan's hybrid 49er gold-rusher and San Francisco 49er quarterback-rusher, the "49er-69er." Not much like Conan's visit to Toronto's Woody's & Sailor with Scott Thompson, but surely the 49er-69er would be much appreciated by the patrons of that establishment...and as evident from the skit, by Thompson and Conan as well.   While I thought Conan couldn't possibly come up with a tower sillier than Chicago's Sears Tower in Sears Clothing, he managed to do just that, mocking the Transamerica Tower as the "Transgender Transamerica Tower," first marching into the Orpheum Theater, and later driving as the improved "Transgender Transamerica Tower in a Trans Am." While Conan has not stopped short of mocking towers in the last few years, it is important to note that the first major mocking of city statues was in Toronto, when Toronto's CN Tower was squared off against Seattle's Space Needle in a monumental international showdown, with the CN Tower taking the victory for Canada.   Finally, a time-honored tradition of Late Night on the road: Conan's tour of his visiting city. Traveling across the Bay Area, Conan finally made a stop at the highlight of any San Francisco trip, to the house where outside shots of the hit sitcom "Full House" were filmed. Upon his arrival, Conan discovered the tenant to be Bob Saget, who played Danny Tanner on the show for eight years. Saget then took Conan around the rest of the city (including a hilarious go-kart ride uphill), similar to Conan's tour of Toronto with local Scott Thompson. Just as in Toronto (and later Chicago), Conan took to the streets with a famed local Mr. T...Mr. Tanner, that is. Sure, it may sound ridiculous, but you can't argue with the facts, people.   This is not to say that Conan's week in San Fran did not provide for a great week of television, as his trips outside of Studio 6A always do. The guests were great, the running sponsorship joke of Intel and Sam Wo was hilarious, and his trips to the winery, Intel factory, and especially the Lucasfilm compound were fantastic. However, his trip to San Francisco began to remark that the comparisons between Toronto and Chicago were not merely a coincide, but perhaps Conan simply trying to match the hilarity and genius of that glorious week in Canada in February 2004. Again, I plead to Late Night to stop trying to travel across North America and trying to match that week, and instead just come to your senses and replicate the glory that was Late Night in Toronto by returning to the city that made it happen. Time can only tell whether this will happen, or whether there will simply be another "Deja Vu: Part Three" from another city next May sweeps.